What an awesome day. The day has been full of politics and learning.
In a town about 2 hours away I’ve listened to proposals about how our party should relate to questions like work, climate and equality. I had the luck of having one of our provincial politicians to turn to with all my questions and who pointed out the who’s who of the liberal world. Next time maybe I’ll even feel secure enough to get up on stage and speak out what my own opinion is instead of just listening.
At least, that’ll be my own personal challenge.
But oh am I enjoying this forum! Next time I hope I can stay for the whole weekend instead of just a day.
Lately I’ve been amazed at how lady luck seems to have been smiling towards me and now after talking to my Bear I’m realising that maybe it’s the fact that I’m interested that’s making the difference. I’m interested in the subject I’ve chosedn for my final paper so it feels pretty smooth going (at least much smoother than I thought it would be). I’m interested in politics and thus find ways to make it work and find the meetings to be enormously giving. I’m interested in making my life be a little bit less of a rollercoster ride and this have taken steps in trying to be a little less of a drama queen. Nothing’s perfect of course, but I feel damned lucky none the less.
Ok, I know, it’s not as easy as “just to find an interest”. I get that. I’ve had 27 years of trying to find things around me interesting. For me, getting rid of the TV was how I finally started finding things interesting (after 1 1/2 months of tv abstinens where the Bear had to deal with my shitty mood). And then it’s been pretty much a process of realizing of what ensured that I don’t miss that TV all that much (like not drinking massive amounts since having a hangover with no TV is not to be recommended). Thus, not having any really easy solutions to spend my free time on, I’ve been forced to find things to do and realized that different things I earlier thought craved too much from me are actually all the more enjoyable.
The more energy is put behind it, the more pleasure there is to reap from it. Right?
Anyway, despite my lows, my good days are starting to feel pretty darned balanced and I’m thankful for a lot of things. The fact that I have such great parents, a great Bear to turn to and love and friends that accept me for who I am. I have the possibilty of going to college and having a job. I have interests that drive me forward and give me the chance to pat myself on the back for a job well done. I live in a town that offers all the help I can ask for.
…And the wisdom to appreciate it (atleast most of the time). I couldn’t ask for more.
Sweet kisses to all.
